My parents had 3 girls and a boy. I am the youngest. My brother is the second oldest. He is 10 years older than me. He was awful to me, but I was probably an incorrigible brat. I am not removing accountability from him and his big brotherly abuse. He was the only person that could incense me to blind rage and I think it may have been a game for him. However, the tables temporarily turned on him one sunny and breezy afternoon as he lie napping on the family room floor.
I had a cat named JJ who was fierce and smart. I think she may have been a Jack Russell Terrier in a cat suit. She had no fear. She had a kitten whom my brother affectionately named Fraidy Cat. Every time my brother walked into the room where Fraidy Cat was peacefully resting my brother would shout: “FRAIDDDDDDDY CATTTTTT” and the cat would run out the room as if his fur was ablaze. My brothers’s terror was not limited to bipeds.
We had a sliding glass door in our family room that opened onto a deck into our backyard. It had a curtain in front of it. As my brother dozed dreamily the curtain in front of the sliding glass door blew over his head. The only thing you could see if you were on the back deck was his bushy blond head. As I mentioned, JJ was fierce and smart. She could place her paws on the screen door in front of the sliding glass door and slide it gently across the tracks. She would often let herself in, but had the habit of not closing it once she gingerly and proudly stepped inside the house. On this particularly glorious and radiant day she carefully slid the screen door open and in front of her was this blond bushy mass. She, of course thought it was an intruding dog and sunk her claws into it, attacking its “furry head.” I have never seen my brother move so fast or screech so loud in my entire life. JJ dislodged herself from my brothers head and promptly ran away to safety.
I, on the other hand, did not run away. I stood there in awe of JJ. I managed to stifle my glee. This was the first time I had seen my brother vulnerable and in pain. I secretly felt JJ paid him back for not only his unkindness to me, but to Fraidy Cat.
My brother no longer taunts me. He is a good and decent person. He is smart and curious and has a great sense of humor. AND I am no longer a brat which contributes to our easy relationship . We are able to laugh and reminisce about our recollection of our sibling dynamics. We both understand the importance of what it means to be a good and decent person. What we put out in the world will most likely come back to us with great force. My preference is be kind, empathetic and respectful. I am not perfect at it, but I will continue to try. The restaurant is a place to practice these skills since we are managing a myriad of moods and personality types everyday. I often say” “if someone is disrespectful or condescending don’t let them drag you down to their level, just smile and wave!” Had I had that skill set when I was seven and being taunted by my brother we could have avoided a lot of tears and aggravation! What goes around comes around is a great motivator for me to be a good person in the world.
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